seven months on
Woke up, fell out of bedJohn Lennon / Paul McCartney
Dragged a comb across my head
Found my way downstairs and drank a cup
And looking up, I noticed I was late
Seven months on from ‘retirement’ I’m reading some of the lyrics from The Beatles ‘A Day In The Life’. Well, you are rarely late for anything when you don’t work.
8.11 am. So I wake up and fall out of bed, find my way downstairs and now drinking a large mug of coffee with two half-covered chocolate digestive biscuits.
8.55 am. “Alexa, play Radio Caroline”, and into the shower. Showers don’t last as long these days with energy prices the way they are.
9.45 am. Thursdays have sort of become our weekly shopping day. “So what are we eating next week?”. “What’s left in the freezer?” “Where are we going?”. “Morrisons shelves are empty”. And so on. List made, we’re off to try Lidl. You don’t need two people to shop, only to pack.
1.00 pm. £90 lighter. And confirmation that there are no tomatoes to be had. Hens, presumably, have joined the masses of people striking as there are no eggs either. Fortunately beer and wine aplenty.
2.00 pm. I’m trying to summarise our bin collections for the rest of the year. Glasgow City Council used to send you this information, but now it’s online. When you download and print it off it’s almost illegible. Well done to the clown or clowns who came up with this.
9.00am – 5.00 pm. All the while this is going on you have daytime television to contend with. It’s mind-numbingly repetitive. Lorraine, This Morning, Loose Women, Steph’s Packed Lunch, Countdown, A Place In The Sun, A New Life In The Sun and the rest. There are alternatives, but how many re-runs of Frasier and the like can you watch?
7.00 pm. I’m at Glasgow Indoor Bowling Club for our team’s Thursday night league game. We haven’t exactly set the heather alight this session, but we have won the previous two games. Two hours later we have another two points on the board, scraping through by one shot, 15-14.
9.10 pm. I’m back in time to catch most of the second half of the Man Utd v Barcelona match. Man U scrape through too.
10.40 pm. Question Time on BBC 1. Was this ever any good? Ten minutes in, I think of a question, “What’s the point?”, and turn it off
Let’s not do this all again tomorrow.